stinken liar blogs!

The other day I read this on my sweet nieces facebook wall. "Sometimes I look at other people's blogs and think how much more productive, creative, and I think I should do so much more with my time and my kids than I do...not a fan of feeling like that".
Got to admit I have done the very same thing, thought these same thoughts, only all of my kids are all in their 20's or 30's, so I can't change a whole lot at this point in time anyway. But it hasn't stopped me form the inadequate monster or the I should have's.
It got me thinking-How often do we compare ourselves to others and come up short on the parenting scale?

HERE IS SOME PERSPECTIVE!

The scriptures are full of "blogging" so to speak and there are TONS of blog-i-fied scriptures about parents with less than stellar familial conditions and outcomes. Sure, there are some pretty great kids in the scriptures- Isaac comes to mind. Could you just see that story in blog form? ABRAHAM_ spent the entire day with my boy Isaac, hiking to the top of a mountain together- building a fire and roasting some ram-(AFTER the angel declared Isaac wasn't on the menu). And then there would be some pictures of the two of them gathering wood and sword fighting with marshmallow sticks. Can you just see it? There is some quality parent/child time going on there to be sure- just hanging out. Did Isaac freak on his Dad's head when Abraham told him- " Son- you are the sacrifice today!"- nope -just took it all in stride and accepted what his Dad was doing. No acting out, not tantrums or crying fits, and no "time out" was needed there. I give Abraham a lot of credit for rearing such a great kid. But I think Isaac was pretty amazing all on his own.
But how often in the scriptures do we read about what some might construe as failed parenting?
I give you Cain and Able. I am sure Father Adam and Mother Eve spent time with both these boys teaching them and caring for them, but Cain killed Able because he was jealous. Does that make their parents failures? Did they not teach the boys the same rules and acceptable behaviors? And what about Laman and Lemuel. Jealous rebellion gone a muck! They can't even blame it on middle child syndrome. Nope, they were just rotters making bad choices- as kids sometimes do.
Even God, who is all knowing and loves us unconditionally, lost a third of his children to the dark side. Lesson? Just as we can't take credit for everything our kids do right, we shouldn't take the blame for everything they do wrong.
I wonder when I read Miss Perfect Susie Homemakers blog about all the amazing things she and her perfect children are doing in their perfectly decorated and smashing, crafted up home, if she isn't being a tiny bit selective in the things she chooses to write about. She probably isn't going to tell you that she screamed at her 4 year old for 3 minutes solid like a rabid harpie because at breakfast he stuck his elbow in his cheerios and spilled milk all over the handpieced, cross stitched table cloth.
She doesn't tell you that she spent so much time scrap booking the pictures of her little angels piano/violin recital that her children, left on their own for 3 hours, painted on the living room wall with double chocolate chunk jello pudding... just to entertain themselves.
The great thing is, God doesn't expect you to be like perfect Susie homemaker down the street. He only expects you to be like him. Period. He is the ONLY person you should be comparing yourself to. And lucky for us, God has infinite patience, so he can wait for you to perfect yourself- for eternity if it takes that long...and it will. Where as mothers, well, our patience is spread a bit thin from time to time.
And then there is the feelings of I am never going to be good enough. And who says you aren't "good enough?" Do your kids say that? No-you do. The most harmful thing we do to ourselves is think because we aren't like those crafty, energetic, creative people who spend a lot of time blogging about their perfections, we aren't good enough.
Now that I am 50-ish I have learned that everyone feels inadequate as a parent. Remember the scriptures? How do you think Lehi felt, or Abraham, or Jacob-heck Jacob's kids sold their little brother to some Ishmaelites and then told Jacob that Joseph was dead, only to find out later that he was kicking it up in Egypt. I bet the thought went through Jacobs mind that he had gone wrong somewhere as a parent. Kids don't come with a list of how to's! And just when you think you have it figured out, another one comes along who is totally different and needs an entire new list of parenting skills from you. You won't do everything right but you'll do enough right. I believe that our children come to us for specific reasons. You are exactly who they need to get them through the life ahead of them. A mother who loves her children is a GREAT mother! If you watch a movie with your 4 year old instead of reading flash cards and practicing piano is he going to die? Nope. If he eats cereal for dinner once in a while will he shrivel up and become
malnutrition man? I don't think so. I still remember the very special times when my mother let us eat gingersnaps dipped in milk for dinner. It was the highlight of my childhood. BEST DINNER EVER!!! Personally, I think kids need to be kids- not concert pianists in a 5 year old body. Cartoons will educate- just ask my kids. Everything they know they learned from Bugs Bunny. Well, not everything, but parts! It hasn't hurt them as far as I know. Is it any wonder that Utah is the prozac capital of the world? Holy over achievers, batman!!! Lighten the heck up, people. Have some fun with your kids, love them, keep them safe and fed. Go ahead and read the blogs, you may get some great ideas, but remember those words on that page are not the entire picture. And just be you- the Mom your kids love. Ask yourself this. When they are throwing a fit because you are leaving them with a babysitter, are they crying for Susie Homemaker down the street or are they cry for MOM? Mom....that would be YOU!