I am trying desperately to make a decision here. Do I go to New York for the huge Surtex art show or do I stay home and cower in the corner? I have a teeny weenie confession: I HATE TO FLY. If I am with other people it's ok, because I can take drugs and be gorked out of my mind, and they just steer me around the airport in a drug haze and I don't remember a thing. But when I go alone- I have to have some wits about me or I would end up sleeping on the floor in the mens restroom in Tulsa, Oklahoma and missing a connecting flight because heaven forbid you fly direct from Raymond Alberta Canada- THAT is not a pretty picture.
SIDE NOTE: That is another strike against going. I have to drive 2 1/2 hours to either Great Falls, Montana or Calgary, Alberta to catch a flight, and there is usually a layover with a connecting flight and it's literally a 5 am to 9 pm day. GGRRRR. You people who zip to the airport in 20 minutes, hop on a plane and fly direct have no idea how lucky you are!!! I may as well live in outer darkness Podunkville- OH WAIT....I DO!!!
The silly thing is, I am not afraid of the airplane ride itself. I am not afraid of crashing- I can think of far worse ways to exit this life. No, my fear is totally insane. It's the shape of the airplane, the claustrophobia, and you can't get up and leave when things get dicey - it's the fact that always, without fail, people loose their lunch on airplanes and THAT, my dear readers is the BIGGEST phobia of all. Yup- I can not stand to see, hear or smell anyone throwing up. I get hot and clammy even if someone tells me they FEEL sick! I have panic attacks and I have actually jumped out of moving cars to escape the scene of a sick person. Can't quite jump out of a moving airplane though- I believe that is frowned upon. But I have wanted to several times.
You may wonder what happened when my kids got sick. For some reason, I was able to handle them- possibly because I started out small-as did they- with just spit up. But as they got bigger I dealt with it. Not all the time. If they missed the mark- Stew cleaned it up, sweet and kind husband that he is. I really believe that because God knows me and loves me and he knew I would have kids that occasionally got the pukes, I would need some help. I do better with the girls too. Kurt is on his own. That might be because he brings it all the way from his toenails. The girls are more lady like- if that is possible.
Ok - enough of that- I am making myself ill.
Another reason I don't want to go is the world is totally and completely bonkers right now. New York is nuts!!!! They are talking about a city wide strike. Just my luck- I would be stuck there forever because there isn't a government in the world who can get anything done right now. I would be homeless in NYC- living with the vagrants under the subway- and they might throw up! Oh the horror of it all.
I wish I wasn't such a travel wimp. I have friends who travel to all kinds of exotic destinations and everything that happens to them is an ADVENTURE. I wish I could be like that. Maybe it's the alone thing. I have taken my kids with me to various places and Stewart and I have gone to Mexico and Hawaii several times. But New York is business and it's just not practical to drag Stewart along for the ride.
So every year, I start in January, trying to decide if I should go to the May show in New York. I fret about it for 4 months. Sometimes I talk myself into it but most times I talk myself out of it.
I love New York most of the time. But travel now a days is a total crap shoot. And then there is the full body grope or porn picture dilemma. Which one of those humiliating injustices do I choose?
I will most likely go... Or maybe not.
7 comments:
Peronally I'd go with the porn picture over the full body grope. If you need a tag along, I know someone who would totally go with you... lol.
Your phobia of planes sounds like my phobia of sharks. Maybe we should start a support group? Whatever you decide, I'm sure it'll be the right choice for you :)
Look, I have a Google account, so I can comment on your blogs now. Yay!
You should go to the New York show in 2015 because my court reporters association is going to New York then. So we can both have write-off vacations, and you can be drugged out of your mind because I can drag you around the airport.
Go already!
Take some Vics Vapo-Rub and if somebody starts the technicolor yawn, out a little swipe under your nose. You won't smell anything but Vics. Oh, and some earplugs. Voila... No smell, no sound.
Go go ! It will be an adventure like everything aren't you sick of boring ray town after a long long winter!,plus I so want to go someday so bad so if anybody gets the opportunity to go I say go but that's just my vote:)
But Sean- I would also have to gouge my eyes out with a pointed stick! I seriously do NOT know how you do what you do day after day. I would be in a padded room for sure and curtain! Ok I'll go...maybe
Wait until next year. No strike. We can plan a head and get tickets to shows and cheaper plane tickets. And I will come with you. And Christal can come too.
Or go this year and me and Oscar will come... but no shows with Oscar.
New York is mine and Mom's thing, Whit. :P Ha!
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